President Of Harvard's Oldest Finals Club Makes Their First Public Statement Since 1791 Saying Coed Membership Could Increase Sexual Assualts

Boston.com – The graduate board president of Harvard’s oldest final club broke 225 years of silence to sharply criticize the university’s push to make the all-male club add female members. In a letter to The Harvard Crimson published Wednesday, Porcellian Club grad board president Charles M. Storey defended the exclusively male social club by saying that introducing female members could increase sexual assaults.

“Given our policies, we are mystified as to why the current administration feels that forcing our club to accept female members would reduce the incidence of sexual assault on campus,” Storey wrote. “Forcing single gender organizations to accept members of the opposite sex could potentially increase, not decrease the potential for sexual misconduct.” Storey, a former club member and graduate of the class of 1982, is the president of Harpoon Brewery. The comments to The Crimson are the first known public statements since its founding in 1791, Storey said, which reflects the club’s “abiding interest in privacy and the importance of the situation.”

Storey also said that going co-ed should be the club’s choice alone. “As a club that is completely independent of Harvard, which accepts no funding from Harvard, which owns its own property, and believes fervently in the right to self-determination, that decision is ours, not Harvard’s, to make,” Storey wrote.

I couldn’t disagree with Charles M. Storey more if I tried. Honestly this is one of the most disappointing stories I’ve ever blogged. It’s not about what he said because I agree 1,000% with it. The fact Harvard thinks they can tell a private club that is independent of Harvard, which receives no funding from Harvard, owns their own property that they need to accept girls is bananaland. But I just hate the fact he even gave them the satisfaction of publicly commenting on it. I mean you’re telling me the Porellian Club hadn’t made a public statement about anything since 1791? 1791! And they caved for this garbage? Teddy Roosevelt must be rolling around in his grave. Literally nothing is sacred anymore.

PS – I feel like the only guy who has successfully stood up to the feminists in the past 3 centuries is Hootie Johnson. That dude at the Masters who flushed Martha Burke down the toilet when she tried to protest the Masters being a male only clubs. Oh you’re going to put pressure on our advertisers? We’ll run the Masters commercial free. Alpha male city.